This piece represents my desire to spread love, but my distrust in accepting it from others. Trust is something I struggle with currently, not because I think that others are incapable of being inherently good, but because I've convinced myself that I'm the problem. For a long time I couldn't understand why anyone would ever want to be in my company. I was broken, unhygienic, boring, and depressing even.
It wasn't the qualities that I imposed onto myself having that drove people away from me, but self sabotage. I didn't reach out to others, therefore no one reached out to me. I pushed people away from standing at a distance in fear of judgement or an impending abandonment, therefore people didn't feel welcome at my side.
This piece is to remind me of who I am: Someone who loves people, loves love, and always wants to have others by my side. However, it is also a reminder of who I need to become: Someone who isn't afraid, because they don't need to be. Someone who invites people in, instead of making them fight their way through a barricade in order to for them to know me.
It wasn't the qualities that I imposed onto myself having that drove people away from me, but self sabotage. I didn't reach out to others, therefore no one reached out to me. I pushed people away from standing at a distance in fear of judgement or an impending abandonment, therefore people didn't feel welcome at my side.
This piece is to remind me of who I am: Someone who loves people, loves love, and always wants to have others by my side. However, it is also a reminder of who I need to become: Someone who isn't afraid, because they don't need to be. Someone who invites people in, instead of making them fight their way through a barricade in order to for them to know me.